Grass Page 13

  Everything spun round in my head, making me dizzy.

  How could I have forgotten that he’d shot a man in cold blood? I closed my eyes, and like the rerun of an old movie I was, once again, standing under the trees. Hidden by the darkness, hearing the click of a gun. I saw Armour with the light from the hallway on his face. Saw those rubies of blood spatter over the gun across his face. Saw him wipe the blood from his mouth in disgust, spit on his fingers. Then wrap his hands around the barrel again.

  Saw it all in my mind. And a bold plan began to form – a dangerous plan. Could I do it? Dare I?

  Yet I knew in that same second nothing was going to stop me.

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  41

  I waited till night crept through the town. I watched it from my bedroom window as it loomed over the river, turning the pink sky to battleship grey and then to ink black. The river was as smooth as smoked glass. The streets fell silent. It was after midnight. And I was ready.

  I pulled on my black sweater over my school trousers, the darkest trousers I had. I wanted to move unseen through the streets. I had a long night ahead.

  First I had to make sure I wouldn’t be missed. I took two pillows from the cupboard and arranged them long ways on the bed. Then I dragged the duvet up and over them. My mum was always complaining that I shouldn’t hide myself under the covers.

  ‘You’ll suffocate one of these nights,’ she always said, cheerily. ‘I’ll come in here one morning to wake you up and you’ll be under there, blue in the face, tongue hanging out of your mouth.’

  If she looked into my room in the middle of the night she’d see what she always did – her son tucked tight under the covers. I stood back and surveyed my handiwork. Yes – it could pass for someone lying under there. I was sure of it.

  Now all I had to do was get out of the house without anyone hearing me.

  They were all asleep as I tiptoed downstairs. I could hear Dad snoring.

  I wished I could shut my mind off. Block everything else out. Concentrate on what I had to do. Concentrate only on tonight. I kept my trainers in my hand, remembered to miss the second step from the bottom, the one that squeaked. I made my way into the utility room. Under the sink was something else I had to remember. I pulled out Mum’s bag of hospital gloves. Stolen or not, I needed them tonight. I’d seen too many C.S.I.s to know I couldn’t risk leaving any of my fingerprints anywhere. I shoved a few pairs in my pocket and left the house.

  I crept through the streets, taking the path that led through the park. It was popular during the day for mums with their prams and their toddlers. But notorious at night for drug dealing. I would have to be careful.

  Was I really doing this? I kept thinking I would wake up any minute back in my own bed. I even nipped at my arm, just in case. But no, this was real.

  Halfway through the park I saw a couple of hoodies, bent over, looking on the ground. I darted back into the trees and waited, hoping they would move on soon. I didn’t have to wait long. They had only dropped something – their syringes probably – and after a few moments they were gone, stumbling along the path, passing only metres away from me and into the darkness.

  After another moment I moved too. I had a way to go. No time to waste. Through the back streets and the alleys. I even planned to take a shortcut through the cemetery.

  But I wouldn’t stop till I got to where I was going.

  I was heading to the spot where I had watched Armour shoot McCrae. I was going back there to retrieve the gun.

  Armour had seen me witness the shooting but he hadn’t known – couldn’t know – that I hadn’t run off right away. That I’d stopped for those moments and seen where he’d hidden the murder weapon, wrapped in a black bin bag.

  I was in Armour’s power, yes. But he was in mine too. I knew where that gun was. And that was the one thing I was sure that even he wasn’t aware of.

  Had he been back to get it? I’d thought about that all day. Would all this be a wasted journey? I didn’t think so. There was still a police presence round the house. He couldn’t risk coming back here. Armour anywhere near this area would look suspicious. Then, another thought – would he have got some of his men to get the gun back?

  No. He could have had any of his men eliminate McCrae for him. But he had done it himself. He didn’t want anyone to know what he’d done. I was the only one who knew.

  My gut instinct told me that the gun would still be there. I saw again in my mind the way Armour had wiped the blood from his mouth. The disgust on his face as he had tasted McCrae’s blood. He’d spat on his fingers then those same fingers had closed round the butt of that gun. Armour’s DNA would be all over it.

  That thought kept me going. His DNA would be all over it.

  The town was deathly quiet as I crept through the night. I saw no one. Only heard the odd police siren in the distance. Once the screech of wheels of some boy racer as he headed home.

  The cemetery was the eeriest part of my journey. If I could have avoided it I would have. But it was a great shortcut. I climbed over one of the gates at the side and stood for a moment looking around.

  They’re all dead in here, I kept telling myself. But I couldn’t get out of my head the zombie films Sean and I loved to watch. Remembered how the zombies clawed their way towards the surface, dragged themselves up from their graves. Began their shambling walk towards their human prey, hungry for warm human flesh. My flesh.

  I began to run. The sooner I was out of this cemetery, the better I’d feel.

  Once I stopped and almost screeched out when I heard the bushes rustle behind me. I swung round expecting to see a horde of zombies heading my way. They’d never catch me, I thought. They were always too slow. Then I remembered that in the latest batch of zombie movies those zombies could run.

  Of course there was no one behind me. Some wee animal – a squirrel, a cat – had hidden in the bushes probably. More scared of me than I could ever be of it. Zombies didn’t exist. They weren’t real. The dead couldn’t come alive. I should only be afraid of real villains – like Armour.

  But I kept running anyway.

  I had another wall to climb to get out. Landed right in the middle of more bushes. They seemed to bounce me on to the ground. Something fell from my pocket. A quick search told me what it was. My torch. I sat for a moment, trying to get my breath back.

  My torch was gone. I knelt on the ground, tried to feel around for it. But there were too many bushes, too many cracks in the ground. It could be anywhere. It would take ages to find it. And I didn’t have ages.

  Finally I gave up. I wouldn’t need it, I told myself as I moved on. I knew where I was going and what I had to do. I would not need the torch.

  Once out of the cemetery I ran through the back gardens. At last I could see the wall behind the Chinese takeaway where I had hidden that night. This was it.

  I checked all around. Could see no one. I took a deep breath and crept closer.

  Half of me, the half with that wild imagination, expected to find Armour still crouched there, caught in time. The gun enveloped in black still in his hand.

  But of course there was no one. Nothing. Only litter and the odd plastic bag caught on the trees. Only a weird kind of quiet – as if the world was waiting to see what would happen next.

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  42

  I crouched down, breathless, and crawled towards the spot. The end of the pipe was barely visible. It was stuffed with crisp packets – you would hardly know a pipe was there at all. I almost missed it myself. But when I spidered my hands and ran them along the surface of the ground my fingers caught on the jagged edges. I pulled the packets free, exposed the black hole. This was the moment I had to brace myself for. The moment I put my hand inside that long black tube. Thank goodness I had the protection of the gloves. Thin enough so t
hat I could feel anything, yet with a slim layer to protect me if there was anything else down there waiting to bite me.

  I took a deep breath, flexed my fingers and let them tiptoe inside the pipe. It was drier in there than I had expected. Not filled with grimy water, just damp. But I could feel no rifle butt wrapped in plastic.

  Had he moved it? Come here one dark night just like me and taken the gun?

  I almost drew my hand out. Coming here was a waste of time.

  But Armour’s arm was longer than mine. He could reach further. He would have pushed it down as far as it would go.

  Another horrifying thought – had he pushed it in so far that I could never reach it?

  I was only a boy. What was I doing here? There was nothing I could do. It was too late.

  I saw the horrifying future. Armour would grass on Nelis. Nelis would be arrested. And then Armour would go after my dad . . . And David . . .

  No! I couldn’t ever let that happen. I couldn’t stop now.

  And all the time these terrifying thoughts were tumbling in my head, my fingers stretched further down that black hole.

  Every second I was terrified of what else I might find. Rats could have made their home down there . . . or a whole nest of spiders . . . or – my imagination went haywire. Or some kind of alien creature lurking in the dark, waiting for some idiot’s hand to come close so it could grasp at my fingers. Envelop them. Suck its way up my arm. Take over my whole body . . .

  NO!

  I jerked my fingers back. I couldn’t do this.

  But Armour had done it.

  By now I was lying flat on the ground, my arm in the pipe up to my elbow. I had to go further. My fingers splayed inside searching all around. Didn’t want to miss anything down there. I pushed my arm in even further. Tried to block every terror from my mind.

  I was in up to my shoulder and still nothing. It was gone for sure, I thought, and then, just when I thought I could reach no further, my fingers touched something cold. Something plastic.

  I held my breath. I would have to push my arm in even further to get a grip so I could yank it out. I was so flat on the ground now that my chin was touching the pipe. But now all I had was one thought. I had found it. It was still here.

  At last my fingers closed round the barrel. I began to pull. It didn’t move. It was wedged in tight. Surely after all this I’d be able to pull it out.

  Panic began to set in. To be this close, and fail?

  No. I wouldn’t let that happen. I pulled again. Then again. And at last it seemed to come alive. Jerked with my hand. Came loose.

  Now I had a firmer grip. I inched it back down the pipe. Didn’t want the bin bag ripped or torn. Didn’t want the evidence contaminated.

  And I had the evidence of Armour’s guilt, clutched round my fingers. I had it almost in my hand.

  At last it came, emerging from the pipe like something newborn.

  But it was a gun wrapped in black and it was evil.

  No. The gun itself wasn’t evil – just lying here on the ground it was harmless. It was the hands it could fall into and how they would use it that would turn it into something evil.

  I sat up and leaned against the wall. I pulled the gun on to my lap. It was heavier than I’d imagined it would be. And I knew in that moment I never wanted to be near a gun again. Never wanted to touch one, or feel the terror of what it was capable of. My mind played over and over the moment I had seen that gun come to life. It’s life had been someone’s death. McCrae’s.

  Well now it could help put the man responsible behind bars.

  I had the power in my hand – but how to use it?

  I had thought long and hard about what to do next, as I had sat by the river. Gone over all my options.

  I had thought at first I would call the police to tell them where to find the gun. But a call could be traced. And so soon after my meeting with Armour, he would surely put two and two together and know, or suspect, it was me who’d grassed on him.

  No. Had to keep my family – David – safe.

  Should I walk into a police station and calmly hand it over?

  There’d be too many questions. And Armour would know I was the one who had brought it in.

  David’s face in front of me again. Smiling, laughing. No. I had to protect him.

  Should I leave the gun somewhere for the police to find?

  I had dismissed that right away. Too much chance of some lowlife or some drug addict finding it first. It would once again be in dangerous hands and, worse, the evidence of Armour’s guilt might be wiped clean.

  Or should I hide the gun somewhere myself? Use it as my insurance that Armour would leave my family alone? Leave David alone?

  Don’t think I didn’t consider that. Blackmailing Armour. Sweet revenge.

  But then I’d never be free of him. And even worse, it would make me almost as bad as he was. Bring me down to his level.

  No. I had to do the right thing. Or at least, the only thing that was left available to me.

  I had to make sure Armour was brought to justice but in a way he would never know it was me.

  He was meeting Nelis at 3 a.m. At the Willow Bar. Armour would want to see the merchandise he was pretending he would buy. And as soon as he found out where the guns were, he’d send the police there to find them.

  A daring plan had begun to form in my mind this morning by the river. But it was too dangerous. Too scary. And I had racked my brain to come up with something better, some safer way. But I couldn’t. If there was an alternative I wasn’t clever enough to think of it.

  In that moment I wished Sean was there beside me. To talk to, to discuss it with. The two of us could always figure things out. Making up stories for our adventures as we searched the old derelict properties.

  It was thinking of Sean that gave me the courage to move on. I would think of this as one of our games. As if Sean was moving in the dark with me, giving me courage. I wouldn’t be so afraid then.

  I stood up, held the gun in my arms as if it were a baby, and I began to run.

  g

  43

  The town was still silent, still dark. I was on a deadline, a race against time. Sean and I always had a race against time. And that memory kept me going too. I ran through the back roads, the back gardens of tenements. Leaping over walls, crawling through hedges. It was in the early hours of a Sunday, and there was still people about in town. I passed teenage girls giggling their way home from the local disco. They didn’t see me. Too busy texting on their mobiles to notice anything. The odd taxi flew past and when I heard one coming I’d flatten myself against a wall till it had roared off into the distance again. I had a gun in my arms. I didn’t want anyone to remember seeing me. I had to stay focused.

  I took my life in my hands, crossing over the railway tracks and under the bridge. I was leaving McCrae’s territory now. Nelis and Armour both wanted control of it. How could I have doubted anything else? I had always known these things. Armour wanted to take over from McCrae, so did Nelis. Armour wanting peace? How could I have been so stupid as to believe that?

  I could have told you, pal. Sean’s voice. I could almost hear it break the night silence. Yes. Sean would have kept me right if I could have told him what I’d witnessed. But I’d been afraid to. Afraid I might put him in danger too.

  No point thinking about that now, I reminded myself. Keep moving. Heading for Nelis’s territory.

  For a moment I stopped to get my breath back. At the top of the hill the views were stupendous. On a clear night like this with the sky so close I felt I could touch the stars. I could see right up the river – could see Dumbarton Rock and the lights on the Erskine Bridge. There were tankers anchored in the Clyde waiting to go into the container terminal. Everything at peace.

&nb
sp; Except my heart. Beating in double-quick time. Urging me on.

  I checked my watch. It was almost two. So little time to do what I had to do. Armour had a plan but so did I. And if my plan worked Armour’s devious little scheme was going to backfire. Blow up in his face.

  If it worked. If I wasn’t too late.

  What if he’d changed the time he was meant to meet Nelis? What if Armour had met him at midnight? What if he’d already called the police? What if they were already swarming all over Clyde Terrace?

  But they weren’t. In front of me at last, the derelict tenement building. Lying quiet and empty. I lay flat and silent in the jungle of grass and waited. I checked my watch again. Ten minutes to three. I wouldn’t, shouldn’t have long to wait. They were to meet at the old Willow Bar, but I had worked out that it would take them at least ten minutes to get here.

  In fact, it only took them five. It was Armour I saw first. He strode along the terrace as if it was the middle of the day. As if he had nothing to fear. Nelis walked ahead of him, more wary. Looking back, talking to Armour. I could hear nothing of what they were saying. But I didn’t need to hear. I knew what they were talking about. Guns. Nelis’s guns.

  They stopped at the entrance to the first house. Both of them looked round, checking no one was about. I pressed myself further down into the overgrown grass. They had none of their henchmen with them. This was something they wanted to do alone. Nelis knew how to get in. He didn’t need any loose panel. He stood in front of the door and it opened like magic. He stepped inside and with one more glance around to make sure he wasn’t being watched, Armour followed him.

  They seemed to be in there for ever. The sweat poured from me. I couldn’t bear this waiting. ‘I could never have made a real commando,’ I silently whispered to Sean. ‘Not got the nerve for it.’

  Finally they did come out. Nelis first. I knew right away he had been paid. There was a smug look on his face. And he was stuffing an envelope into his pocket. Armour wouldn’t have given him all of the money – not until the guns were safely in his keep. But Nelis had been given a deposit at least. Armour came out next. He looked as if he was laughing. As if something had struck him as funny. Nelis turned and laughed too – as if he knew what the joke was. Then Nelis held out his hand and Armour held out his. Two villains shaking on a deal. Only Nelis didn’t know what the real deal was.