Worse Than Boys Read online

  Wizzie.

  Her red-streaked hair was spiked and fierce-looking and she was chewing gum. She was always chewing gum. Grace, running to catch up with her, looked even more like a horse. Chomping away at her gum too, all she needed was a nosebag and the picture would be complete. They linked arms. Grace, a head taller than Wizzie, looked as if she was holding her up.

  I turned away from Erin as if she wasn’t there. That must have been so annoying for her. I headed straight for Wizzie. Stopped right in front of her.

  Wizzie did her ‘stands back in amazement’ routine, holding up her hands, mock surprise on her face. ‘What have we got here, Grace?’

  ‘She’s come to beg for mercy probably,’ Grace said, smug.

  I didn’t waste time answering that. ‘You said you’d get me.’ I poked Wizzie in the chest and she staggered back a few steps. ‘Fine with me. But I’ll pick the time and place. Today. After school. Up behind the football pitch, far away from the school so the teachers won’t find out.’ I paused. ‘Square go.’ I said that because I didn’t want any knives involved, and if Wizzie agreed to a square go now, with half the school listening, she couldn’t go back on it. ‘You do know what a square go is, don’t you, Wizzie? One at a time. Fair fight. OK?’

  Then I swung past her and walked through the school gates.

  * * *

  By lunchtime news of the fight was all around the school. Moira tried her best to make me change my mind. ‘You haven’t a chance, Hannah. And you know what Wizzie might do …’ Her voice trailed off. The word ‘knife’ unspoken.

  ‘It’s just something I’ve got to do, Moira,’ I said.

  There was a sudden bellow of laughter behind us. ‘A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do!’ Who else but Zak Riley? ‘You think you’re living in the Wild West, Driscoll. You’ve not gotta do anything. Get real!’

  ‘I think she’s been really brave, Zak,’ Moira said.

  I smiled. ‘Thanks, Moira.’

  ‘Brave? Are you kiddin’, Moira? I think she’s dead stupid.’

  ‘It’s better than being dead ugly,’ I snapped back at him.

  ‘And tonight, you’ll just be dead.’

  ‘Don’t bet on it.’

  ‘I’ve never known anybody like you in my life. You like fighting better than boys do.’

  ‘That’s because I fight better than boys do.’

  Zak wasn’t a fighter anyway. He was never in fights. ‘Me and my mates are coming to watch you. It’ll be good for a laugh.’

  ‘I’ll take you on when I finish with Wizzie.’

  Zak laughed and moved off with his mates. ‘I’ll take along a shovel and scrape you up. You’ll be like raspberry jam.’

  It was then I remembered again, Wizzie’s knife.

  Slash! Slash!

  I pictured it in my mind, gleaming in the dying sunlight as it hacked and slashed in front of my face.

  It was the only thing that freaked me out. Wizzie’s knife. The rumour was she always had it on her, the scars on her neck and arms evidence of the knife fights she had been in. How bold I had been when I’d had my friends about me. Wizzie’s knife hadn’t bothered me then. But now I was alone, and I thought about the old woman again. She’d been threatened with a knife. So why should Wizzie draw the line at using it on me? Yet the more I thought about it, the more I realised that she wouldn’t risk her reputation by using a knife when I had none.

  Square go, we had said, and that’s what it would be: a square go. There were certain rules we all stuck to and that was one of them. If there was going to be a lot of people watching, even more reason for her to fight fair.

  The thought of an audience kind of bothered me. Maybe I shouldn’t have challenged them so publicly. But it was too late now. From now on I would have no regrets about anything. So the whole school were going to be there to watch? Good. They would all be waiting for me to be humiliated. I was determined to put up a good show. I wouldn’t win, I knew that. But no one would ever call me a wimp again.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  They were all there, Grace and Lauren and Sonya, and in the middle of them, Wizzie. I’d take her first, I decided, remembering from somewhere that if you cut off the head, the body couldn’t survive. I think I’d heard it in a zombie film, but then, what else were the Hell Cats but a gang of zombies?

  Wizzie turned and stared at me as I approached. ‘Oh, here comes Rocky!’ And then with a wild tribal roar that was meant to take me by surprise I suppose, she threw herself at me.

  But I wasn’t surprised. I had been prepared for anything, even this. I side-stepped her and she landed with a thud on the ground. There was a cheer from the crowd. Wizzie was on her feet in an instant, her eyes blazing. She lunged at me and I grabbed her hair. It was a great target with those spikes of hers. I pulled her head back and kicked the back of her legs. She was down again, this time on her back. I was on top of her in a second, straddling her chest, pinning her wrists to the ground. ‘Give up!’ I said.

  ‘Never,’ she said through gritted teeth. I thought I had her, but with a sudden burst of strength, she arched her back and threw me off her. I tumbled to the ground and only a quick roll to the side stopped her landing on me. Her fist caught the side of my face, and sent my head spinning. I got to my feet quickly and launched myself at her. I wasn’t going to give her a minute.

  This time we both tumbled together on the ground. She had me by the hair. I almost wished I’d had the nerve to tug at the earring on her eyebrow, but I couldn’t bring myself to do that. Instead I punched her on the side of the head so hard her eyes went squinty. She pushed me off her and we both got to our feet. But my punch had knocked Wizzie for six. She was having trouble focussing and took a step back, to let someone else take her place.

  That someone was Grace. ‘My turn,’ she said and she squared up to me, stepping in front of Wizzie.

  The sweat was pouring off me, but I still wasn’t scared. I was too keyed up to be scared. Grace Morgan was big. As she lumbered towards me I realised just how big. But she wasn’t fast. I lowered my head and charged at her and sent her reeling to the ground. There was another roar from the crowd. A different kind of roar this time. All of a sudden they were on my side. I could tell. They wanted me to win.

  ‘Behind you, Hannah!’ Someone yelled it from the crowd. I turned just in time to stop Lauren leaping on my back. I grabbed at her, spun her round and sent her tumbling on top of Grace.

  Sonya was waiting for me next. She let out a scream and ran at me. Sonya’s a big girl too. And fat with it. She hit me so hard we both fell back.

  I was on the ground and almost waiting for the rest of Wizzie’s gang to jump on me, but they didn’t. That wouldn’t have been a square go and they knew it. Instead it was Sonya who leapt at me again, but I held up my hands and pushed her back.

  I was like a wild animal. I was on top of her. She grabbed my ears and rolled me over. I butted her in the face, and that hurt me as much as it hurt her. But at least my nose didn’t bleed. Hers did. I could see anger in her eyes as she tasted her own blood. ‘I’ll kill you for that!’

  ‘Try it.’

  And she almost did. Anger gave her more strength. She was up and leapt at me again. This time I couldn’t dodge her or keep my balance. I began to topple with Sonya on top of me. Her blood dripped on my hair, into my face. She was ready to butt me back as she had me pinned to the ground. I was done for.

  What had Wizzie done to get free of me? I did the same to Sonya, arching my back, lifting my whole body to send Sonya tumbling off me. I was on her in an instant.

  The crowd were going mad, cheering and clapping. I sat astride Sonya, pinning her arms to the ground with my knees, the way I had with Wizzie. Where were the rest of the Hell Cats? I waited for them to jump in, especially Wizzie. But they didn’t. They stood together, watching me, and I couldn’t tell what they were thinking. I looked from them to the mad cheering crowd. I could see Erin and the rest, ashen-faced. They were standi
ng well at the back. But my eyes only flicked past them.

  I looked round at everyone else, relishing the moment. Watching their faces – amazed, and pleased for me too.

  I lifted my hand in the air, thumbs up, then I turned it slowly so my thumb was down, just as if we were in a Roman arena and I was a gladiator.

  It was to be the crowd’s decision what happened next, and they knew it.

  There was a lull in the cheering, then with a roar that almost split my eardrums, almost every hand was held in the air, thumbs up.

  And then they went wild.

  Sonya began to struggle again. ‘Thank God for that!’ she shouted. ‘Now get off me!’

  I leapt to my feet and turned to look round at everyone again. Then I took a slow bow to the cheers and the applause.

  It was a wonderful moment.

  I knew I had won more than a fight that day.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  I got home before Mum and had my bloodstained clothes (their blood not mine, I’m glad to say) in the washing machine and dried even before she came in. I was in my pyjamas sitting in front of the TV when she first noticed my face. My eye was swollen and my cheek was covered in scratches.

  ‘What happened to you?’ She said it in a what’s-she-going-to-tell-me-now? kind of tone.

  ‘I fell in PE. Right off the wall bars.’ The lie came easily and I could see the relief in her face. She didn’t even question it.

  ‘Did you have a good day? Did you have any more trouble?’

  ‘No trouble at all. In fact, I had a brilliant day.’

  She looked as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. You hear that expression all the time, but you don’t think what it really means. But I watched my mum stand straighter. Her face brightened, and I suppose for the first time I realised just how worried she must have been about me.

  ‘You see, sometimes your mother can do something right. That’s because I went up to the school. That’s what’s made them stop.’

  And perhaps she was right. Mum going up to the school had been the thing that changed everything.

  The last straw for me.

  ‘I think that is what made the difference, Mum,’ I told her. And she beamed at me.

  ‘Really?’ She looked so happy, I felt like crying. ‘I’m so glad about that.’

  Mum and I had a lovely night together. She made shortbread, and she makes the best shortbread in the world, though she never believes it. We watched a horror film on video. I just knew everything was going to be different now, because I was going to make it different. Even with my mum. I understood now how you can get to such a point of despair you just want to end it, to sleep for ever. When it had happened to Mum a doctor had told me it was a cry for help. I didn’t understand what he meant then, but I did now. She had cried for help, and no one, certainly not me, had reached out to help her.

  * * *

  Next day, when I walked into school, every eye was on me. And there was something in their gaze that hadn’t been there for a long time.

  Respect.

  Nobody likes a wimp. And I had been a wimp for too long.

  It still made me angry, thinking about how I had let my so-called friends treat me. How I’d behaved too. Never again. I would have my revenge somehow.

  Zak and his mates were all gathered together in the corridor. He couldn’t resist a quip. ‘Hey, Driscoll, good to see the old Hannah back. Where have you been hiding her?’

  Had it been so plain to see that even Zak Riley had noticed it?

  ‘She’s been on holiday. But she’s back, for good,’ I snapped back, and I swept past him.

  Mrs Tasker stormed into class, and she was livid. Her eyes settled on me. ‘There have been reports of a fight near this school yesterday. I believe some of our pupils were involved, and to make matters worse, those pupils were girls.’

  This set the whole class laughing. Zak shouted up to her, ‘Mrs Tasker, it’s not lassies we’ve got in this school, it’s the devil’s daughters.’

  Mrs Tasker went spare. ‘This is no laughing matter!’ she yelled and we all shut up. ‘Hannah. What happened to your face?’

  ‘Walked into a door, Mrs Tasker,’ I said at once.

  She looked even madder. Her eyes moved to Wizzie. Today Wizzie’s nose was like a beetroot stuck on her face, same colour too. ‘And what happened to you?’

  ‘I walked into the same door. We should be suing for compensation. That’s a really dangerous door.’

  The class erupted in laughter again, and it took Mrs Tasker ages to get any order back. Meanwhile, Wizzie turned to look at me, and for the first time there wasn’t any malice in her gaze, just curiosity. She waited for me as we left class. ‘Want to meet up wi’ us later?’

  ‘For another fight? How many times do you want me to beat you?’

  ‘We let you win. Felt sorry for you.’

  ‘In your dreams, McLeod. Anyway, what do you want to talk to me about?’

  Grace butted in. ‘I’m just telling you now, Driscoll, this isn’t my idea.’

  ‘Shut up, Grace,’ Wizzie turned back to me. ‘Meet us at the bus shelters after school.’

  I didn’t want to. Didn’t want anything more to do with the Hell Cats. But I was curious. What could they possibly want to talk to me about? Giving them boxing lessons?

  Mrs Tasker wanted to talk to me too. She came running down the corridor after me and pulled me back. Yesterday I would have been mortified if she’d done that. Everyone seeing her singling me out? Not today. Today I stood tall. ‘Are you going to tell me what happened, Hannah? I know you were involved in that fight. Did that lot jump you, or what?’

  ‘I told you, Mrs Tasker, it was an accident.’ I stared straight into her face as if it was all the truth.

  ‘How can I help you if you don’t confide in me?’

  But I didn’t need her help now. It was too late. ‘Honest, I’m fine.’

  She shook her head in disgust. ‘Are you frightened to grass on them? They’ll never know you told me. I won’t let them know.’

  That almost made me smile. Here I was in the corridor with her, with all eyes on us. They’d never know … ? I don’t think.

  ‘Everything’s sorted now,’ I said.

  Now she really did look mad. ‘If that’s your attitude I don’t see how you can expect any help.’ And she stormed away from me.

  Too little, too late, I thought and then I forgot about her. I forgot about everything except what Wizzie wanted to talk to me about after school.

  They were all there waiting for me at the bus stop. Was I afraid? No. They didn’t look threatening. Wizzie was lounging against the wall. Lauren was sitting on her rucksack. Grace and Sonya were muttering together, about me, I was sure. They didn’t want to have this talk with me at all.

  I stopped dead in front of them. No fear. ‘OK, what’s this about?’

  ‘I d-d-don’t like you,’ Sonya said.

  ‘Feeling’s mutual,’ I said.

  ‘I don’t like you either,’ Grace said, sticking up for her friend.

  ‘Just because I kicked your butt?’ I pretended to study it. ‘Mind you, it would be hard to miss. It’s a big target.’

  Wizzie actually laughed. Even Lauren managed a smile. But Grace swayed on her feet, and if Wizzie hadn’t been there I was sure she would have flown at me.

  ‘See you, Driscoll – you’ve got style.’ I was totally gobsmacked when Wizzie said that. ‘That took a lot of guts to take us on yesterday.’

  Grace tutted and Wizzie turned on her. ‘Be honest, Grace. That did take a lot of guts.’

  But Grace wasn’t about to give in. ‘I’d like to have seen them spread out over the road,’ she said.

  ‘Don’t listen to Grace. She’s really a softie at heart. Anyway,’ Wizzie went on, ‘me and the lassies have been talking, and we’ve got a proposition for you.’ She paused, watched for my reaction to her next words. ‘How would you like to become a Hell Cat?’

  C
hapter Thirty-Four

  For a moment I thought I’d heard her wrong. Or maybe I was dreaming. Had Wizzie really asked me to join her gang? I was so taken aback I didn’t know what to say. Just stood there, staring.

  Wizzie started waving her hands about in front of my face. ‘Hello! Is anybody in?’ She looked at Lauren. ‘The lights are on but nobody’s home.’

  It seemed ages before I found my voice. ‘You’re asking me to join your gang?’

  ‘Count me out of this!’ Grace snapped the words out, too close to my face. ‘I think it’s the worst idea they’ve ever had.’

  ‘They’? So it wasn’t just Wizzie’s idea.

  ‘I’m wi’ Grace on this.’ Sonya moved a step closer to Grace.

  ‘See, Grace and Sonya are against it. And me and Lauren are for it. And because this is a democracy … majority wins.’

  ‘It was an equal vote,’ I reminded her. ‘Two against two.’

  Wizzie just shrugged. ‘Aye, but I arm-wrestled them for the other vote. And I’m bigger than they are.’ She wasn’t actually. She was the smallest of the lot, tiny in size and build, but there was something about Wizzie that made her seem bigger. ‘So … what’s your answer?’

  ‘What’s the catch?’ There had to be a catch. I was sure of it.

  ‘You’re a good fighter,’ Lauren said.

  ‘I don’t want to spend all my time fighting.’

  ‘Neither do we.’ Grace still sounded as if she’d like to grab me by the hair and drag me along the street. ‘We always have a great laugh, the whole lot of us. Brilliant mates we are. Not like your nancy pals. Ooo, the Lip Gloss Girls.’ She pretended to put lipstick on her big horsey lips.

  But we’d had brilliant times too … ‘They’re not my pals,’ I reminded them.

  ‘Well, there ye are. You’ve not got any mates. We could be your mates.’ Wizzie said it as if it was an offer I’d be mad to refuse.

  ‘What would I want you lot for my mates for?’

  ‘Desperation?’ Lauren suggested.

  I turned on her. ‘I’d have to be desperate to join your gang.’